dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize