there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
