was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
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