so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
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