Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
