But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Randomize
