So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
