Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
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