Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
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