Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
