just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
