The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
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