Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
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