I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Randomize
