Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
Randomize
