If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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