So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Fuck me I smell like cheese
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
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