But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Randomize