It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
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