Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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