She's like a pop up book from hell.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
