I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Randomize
