she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Randomize
