Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
What a dumb baby whore.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize
