We won't sleep together?
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Randomize