i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Randomize
