idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
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