Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize
