Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
We have so much sex to catch up on
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
The Olympian is in my bed
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
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