Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Randomize
