So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
