Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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