I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
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