you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
how drunk are you?
Several
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
