She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
