We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
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