I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Randomize
