Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Randomize