there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
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