Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Randomize
