For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
