i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize
