i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Xanax induced break ups are the best. Since I'm a professional fiancee, I'm going to break up with them on Xanax from now on. It didn't hurt one tiiiiiny bit.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
