Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
