Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
