Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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