she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Randomize
