just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
