I wanna bring you to show and tell
the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
I'm drive I can fine osifer
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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