we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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