if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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