I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize
