theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize